reflection

Tame the triggers

Detach from your triggers

15 minutesMedium effort

About This Practice

It’s easy to feel triggered when you’re caregiving. Sometimes it’s the tiniest thing like the way your loved one eats or asks you for help. In this practice, you'll take a more objective approach to discern the real root of your triggered state. You will likely find a greater connection to old wounds than to your loved one. As a result of doing this practice, you’ll be able to detach from the trigger and improve your capacity to see your loved one with greater clarity.

Steps

1

Write your inventory

Think about all the moments recently where you felt triggered by your loved one. Pick one moment that was the biggest trigger. What did your loved one do? How did you respond?

2

Label the trigger

Think about the trigger you identified before. Try not to feel shame or guilt for the way you responded. Label the feeling of the trigger by inserting a word into the following sentence. I felt [blank] when they did [blank].

3

Detach from it

Think about what you felt when you were triggered. What other times do you remember feeling the same way? Are there any patterns you see between those events and the one with your loved one? How are they the same and how are they different? Is it possible you misread or overreacted to the situation?